Musings on Self Love and Self Care

floating, self care, self esteem, self love -

Musings on Self Love and Self Care

From our own Amber Reed a new blog post on fostering self care and self love.

I almost died this year.  This is no exaggeration.  I'm not being "over dramatic", I literally almost died this year.  An emotionally abusive relationship with a man that I thought was "the one" almost killed me.  My body stopped working and then exploded.  I was hospitalized not once, not twice but three times with 3 separate surgeries to save my life.  It took awhile to realize how the negativity in my life affected my health.  I'm still learning to rebuild my health and self esteem that I'm sure will be a life long process to maintain.
Self love and care is so important and taking the time to really look internally and see if those needs are being met isn't something that we think about everyday.  In my quest to be better to myself and let go of the negative emotions that have been festering I decided to do something, anything to make an intentional self care plan.
I bought a special at Float of Bellevue.  If you haven't heard of "floating" before it is a sensory deprivation tank that is filled with a high salt solution.  You can't hear or see anything as you float on top of the water.  You are in a state of meditation, giving your body and your brain a much needed tune-up.
Even after buying the special, I let my purchase sit, unused.  I kept putting it off, focusing too much on work and relationships.  Months went by and every time I thought, "Oh that would be nice to do - an hour to relax and think of nothing." But I always came up with some excuse to NOT take care of myself, my needs.  Was it residual self loathing that came from my previous relationship?  Probably and again I think it will be a life long commitment to recover from that experience.
 
I woke up one morning with a horrible pain in the side of my back, and I thought to myself.."Today is the day." I had finally hit that wall.  I scheduled my appointment for right after work and hoped for the best.  Around 5:30 pm, I joyfully headed straight to Float Bellevue and was ready to do some intentional self work.
Once I got into the floating pod and turned off the light and closed my eyes, I could feel the tension of the weight of my body on my joints lift. I put my arms above my head.. focused on my breathing and went to work. I thought about how good it was to be there, doing absolutely nothing.  Being intentionally good to myself and allowing my body to rest and heal.  I thought about my happiness in life and then I pictured the things I wanted my life to embody.  I took a deep breath and realized that I no longer have to be someone else's status quo.  I no longer have to be someone else's normal.  I am me.  Like my favorite flower, the Dahlia - I'm bold and beautiful and I no longer have to be ashamed.  I want a life OUT of the ordinary.  It's with that intentional self care I was able to come to that realization.  It's something I will continue to strive for and create the life I want to live.  It may be a hard road, there may be some bumps but I'm determined to promote self love and care and just be good to myself from here forward.  
I am bold and beautiful and I will shout it from the rooftops!
Here at Bait'D we embrace the spontaneous, the bold and the unique.  Whether it's self love or love with a partner.  Whether it's exciting and dangerous or soft and intimate.  Whether it's passionate and intense or committed and enduring.  Be you and for crying out loud be good to yourself!